I have a dead microwave. Now it gets to push my buttons.
Dead keypad
This morning, my wife found out that the microwave would no longer accept keypresses on its keypad. Mostly. Upon careful inspection, one key retained some sort of function.
We tried all the variations on “unplug it and plug it back in.” Resurrection was not within our power. It remained dead.
Fire the parts cannon?
I could plausibly “fire the parts cannon at it”. That is, take a guess on the likely dead part, and replace it, rather than properly diagnose the fault. Often that’s the only feasible alternative for the D-I-Y at-home repair, where diagnosing the exact cause of a fault would be difficult without specialized equipment and/or a lot of effort.
The problem is, I could fire and miss. The surface of the keypad has been deteriorating for years, so it’s probably the keypad. But, just to keep it interesting, it might also be the controller board that “runs” the keypad and display. Practically speaking, there’s no way for me to tell, with certainty, which part has gone bad.
Nope, no ammo available
It’s an eleven-year-old countertop appliance. Looks like I could replace it with something comparable for around $130. Given the age and replacement cost, what do you think the odds are of finding a replacement part? Particularly given that this was one of (likely) hundreds of different microwaves offered at that time.
If you said your own theology’s equivalent of a snowball’s chance in Hell, you got it right.
But I checked, just to be sure. There are no replacement keypads for this model for sale. Every on-line appliance parts dealer that I have dealt with in the past lists the part as not in stock, and no longer supplied by the manufacturer. Not even Sears can help me out with this one.
There’s no way to load the cannon, aka I’m SOL on DIY repair.
The grieving, or getting over it.
The actual makes-stuff-hot still functions. It could, in theory, still heat stuff up.
So it grieves me to toss this appliance, for lack of a keypad. But that’s the way the world is, and I just need a few minutes to absorb that into the trash it must go.
It is, effectively, a headless corpse, and sorry, no spare heads are available. It’s what economists call Leontief technology. If 95% of the microwave functions, I still have 0% of a functioning microwave.
It is how most modern tech works.
Oh, Joy, now I have to pick a new one
Question: How much do I want to understand about microwaves?
A: Nothing. You push-da-button, eventually it makes-da-ding, you’re done. I wish no further interaction with microwave ovens. I wish to know neither their features nor their flaws. I accept them as they are.
B: Everything: I’d be pleased to take hours to study up on the fine points of the modern countertop microwave market.
The correct answer is A. But I’m going to have to live with this for years, so I’d best put the time in now, rather than regret what I bought.
Second question: What, exactly, is that woman doing with her hand? I didn’t ask the AI for that.
The decision process
Our existing, dead microwave is a 1.1 cubic foot, 1000 watt model from Sharp. So I’m looking at “countertop” microwaves of about that size. For sure, no more than about 20″ wide.
We never use any of the cooking features on our microwave. All we want to do is turn it on for N minutes to heat or re-heat something. In that regard, I’m guessing we’re like most users. (We don’t even use it for popcorn.)
I’m not hung up on brands, because as I understand it, all microwaves have the same guts now as in, all microwaves (of that size, say) come out of a single factory in China. I think it was Consumer Reports who first discovered that. Sometimes I see that written up with some fudge words, but it all boils down to the same manufacturer, if not literally one big factory in China, for virtually all of the world’s lower-cost microwaves.
We gave up on Made in the USA, but not voluntarily. When we bought our beloved Amana Radarrange, sometime in the prior century, it was the only made-in-USA microwave still in production. But when that went off to appliance heaven, back in 2013, there were no made-in-America microwaves any more. Now, realistically, I think all my options are made in China.
New features are now available, compared our 2013 purchase:
- Mute. Praise the Lord. New models let you turn off the beeping on your microwave. My wife and I agree this is a must-have.
- Capacitance-touch keypads on high-end models. With these, you don’t “push” the buttons, you just rest your fingertip on them. They work not by moving a physical switch (like a traditional or membrane keypad), but merely by registering the change in electrical capacitance that results when you bring your fingertip near the keypad. I have these on one other appliance, and they seem like a vastly more durable keypad. I would prefer this if I could get it.
- Skynet is optional. For now. While high-end microwaves will now interface with your router and phone, many remain simple stand-alone appliances. Please do not make me buy a bluetooth-capable microwave.
- Inverter? Older microwave ovens are one-speed devices, on or off. Reduced power on those devices simply means cycling them them on and off, at full power, repeatedly. New, “inverter” ovens have continuously-variable power. But that comes at greater electronic complexity. We have no need or desire for the new “inverter” tech.
My wife suggested going with the New York Time WireCutter’s pick, (Toshiba, $130-on-sale).
I looked at Amazon only to find that prices are very compressed at the low end of the market. If you want something name-brand, roughly a cubic foot, roughly 1000 watts, you’re going to have to pay about $120 anyway. That’s how it looked to me, and that makes sense if they all come out of the same factory in China. So $130 for the WireCutter pick seemed OK.
In the end …
We went to Lowe’s, to buy one locally that’s in the same family as the one recommended by the NY Times WireCutter. We ended up with this:
https://www.lowes.com/pd/Toshiba-1-1-cu-ft-1000-Countertop-Microwave-Stainless-Steel/1001096976:
This had some but not all of the features we wanted. It’s the same size, power, and form factor as what it replaced. It’s the old tech (on/off), not the new tech (“inverter”). You can turn off the beeps.
The only downside is that it has an old-style membrane keypad, as opposed to (what I see as) the superior capacitance-touch keypad. But this one, unlike the last one, does not require multiple presses on the same key to get started. E.g., press “2” to turn the microwave on for two minutes. So the wear-and-tear should be spread more evenly across the keypad.
Upshot: It’s a mature market.
The upshot is that the new microwave is pretty much identical to the old one. Same size, same wattage, same crappy membrane keypad. Which is about what you’d expect in a mature market. And in any case, they’re all made by the same company in China. Ditto.
In a few small ways, the new machine is better than what it replaces. We can turn off the obnoxious beep. And we can press “2” for two minutes, instead of pressing the start key (30 seconds key) four times.
Blessedly, it has no ability to interact with the outside world, other than the keypad. That we know of. It was, after all, made in the same big Chinese factory, using the same parts, as all other microwaves in this price range. If the Chinese wanted to bring America to its knees, what better way to start than by destroying our ability to reheat leftovers.
In any case, I couldn’t get parts to fix the old one. No surprise there, but I had to look.
Pretty sure my Town will take the old one, for “recycling” of some sort, on the Town’s quarterly recycling day. I have no idea (e.g.) what fraction of the steel in this gets recycled.
And that should be the end of it, for another decade or so.
